Tip #5 for Your Professional Psychic Business: Professionalism At a Psychic Expo
Professionalism isn’t just how you look or what your booth says about you. It’s also about how you read. This list could just as well go under Tip #10 (Ethics) but because these are situations that intuitives often run into at large reading events, I thought they should be highlighted here.
IT’S NOT YOUR JOB TO “SOLVE” YOUR CLIENT’S LIFE FOR THEM
Most of us have a corner of our Being that is “Fix-It Central.” We see a problem and we want to offer advice on what we believe would solve a dilemma or cause the best choice to be made. But that is NOT why clients come to us. For one thing, it is by making decisions that Free Will is exercised; that’s how we learn here in Earthschool. For another, in this world we are constantly disempowered by so-called “experts” telling us not to trust our own judgment, but instead do what they say without checking in with our authentic Selves. We become passive victims of circumstance, rather than living the Examined Life. Moreover, when anyone tries to “fix,” they generally speak from their own life perspective, which means Ego is invested in giving the “right” answer. That’s a guarantee that you will no longer be a clear channel for Spirit, but merely another person pushing the client to go in a particular direction that may have nothing to do with their Free Will and everything to do with yours.
By presenting clients with all angles of a situation and allowing them to choose how to move forward, it strengthens their belief in Self. It also teaches them how to make wise choices affecting many areas of their lives, rather than just the immediate point of inquiry. It’s why, when someone asks, “should I stay with John? Will my new business be successful?” I do not EVER give a simple yes/no answer, but show them ramifications: in the relationship case, the possibilities may encompass whether they stay in the status quo without seeking change; push for counseling or definite change within the relationship; or decide to end it. In the entrepreneurial situation we look at a number of different factors: energy around the client, around the idea of the business, location, marketing, finances, staff, etc. It is then up to the client to take the information given and make an informed choice.
There are no mistakes, only rerouted opportunities. Accept the fact that your client will make some along the way, and they are both necessary and useful. Don’t try to save them from their Life lessons.
CRITICISM OR GOSSIP ABOUT ANOTHER PSYCHIC MAKES YOU LOOK JUST AS BAD
When you are in a room with a bunch of other people who do what you do, it’s inevitable that chitchat starts. But all too often, intuitives who are having a bad show (or bad day), or who are into scarcity thinking (“if she reads then that is one less person for ME”), or who just don’t like anyone else getting attention, will start a round of “Bitchcraft.” What’s Bitchcraft? Talking about another intuitive, judging them, dissing them, or otherwise not being supportive. Example:
At a small show, where booths were close together, the intuitive next door eavesdropped on my session. Her judgment of it was vitriolic, and she made her opinion clear — not to me, but by gossiping to the other readers at the show. There was no way of dealing with the actions in that situation without lowering myself to her level, so it went unaddressed. But that did not mean it was right: by eavesdropping on a session and judging a fellow psychic on what you overhear (which perforce will be incomplete) you are both breaching professional protocol and violating the personal space of both the client AND your fellow intuitive. It is the height of rudeness and unprofessional behavior.
Please. We’re all in this together. And we’re out of high school. So when this behavior starts, don’t take part. Excuse yourself if you must. While you may want to remonstrate with the bad behaviorist, that doesn’t always work; it just makes you a target for next time. But you certainly don’t have to lower yourself.
What happens if another psychic directly hurts you? It does happen. Even that isn’t grounds for public battle, unless there is a legality (if you find reading over their materials that they have plagiarized from your materials, for example) or they actively badmouth you in a public setting, or confront you in front of clients. And the best way of dealing with that is privately if at all possible. You have a right to give them a “cease and desist” regarding their plagiarism, you have a right to confront them away from the public about what they are saying, and you have a right to ask them to leave your space to shield your clients from the confrontation. But do not give into the temptation to give as good as you get. You sink to their level when you do that.
There is ONE circumstance in which you have a right – and a duty – to say something, and that is if a psychic is sexually or ethically inappropriate. Two examples: there was one psychic, now transitioned, whose favorite ploy was telling his female clients that they had been his “slave” in a past life, and that his mastery was still in effect. At one fair, the client was so traumatized by this that she had to be supported from the room and the attached energy cleared by another intuitive; the guilty party was banned from further shows. A second psychic was apparently fond of predicting death times for cancer victims; several psychics (including me) had to do damage control when he predicted “you got seven months, not a day more” while sitting with a man who had had cancer surgery on his jaw two months before.
WHAT HAPPENS IN SESSION STAYS IN SESSION
Our clients come to us with utter trust, baring their souls, lowering their shields, and confessing to us things that no one else ever gets to know. If that sounds like a client and their minister, rabbi, or imam, it’s because we must hold to the same sacred space: what we are told in a session is kept completely confidential.
Sometimes there are amazing stories of how well we foresaw a situation. There are deeply healing conferences a client may have with a deceased loved one, or profound information gained through a past life or spirit guide channeling. And while we love these stories, we cannot and must not share them without permission from the client involved. If we feel compelled to “staff” about a session – think about doctors discussing a patient in the lunch or conference room – we do so only if we absolutely need to, and then only with another intuitive who understands the code of confidentiality.
Even if you change names, in this world of intense social media scrutiny, someone will more than likely guess who and what is being talked about. It will get back to the client – and you will lose their trust and respect. And if word gets out that you treat client information as your own personal awards cabinet, you will very quickly find that your clients go elsewhere.
If you have had an especially intense and useful session, ask the client if they would mind writing a testimonial for you. Most are happy to provide corroboration of your skills. And when it comes in the client’s own words, it is a thousand times more powerful than if you simply share a “war story” (no kidding, there I was with the client and…). But don’t speak of it publicly unless you have permission.
ADMIT IT WHEN YOU ARE NOT MAKING A CONNECTION
There are many psychics who say they are accurate to an unlikely degree. (My philosophy: even the best of us are only 85% accurate; the only one 100% accurate is God, and I don’t think he’s doing private readings for an hourly rate these days.) Accuracy is actually a relative thing, and claiming a high percentage is very tempting to that ego part of us that wants to be the best, the most useful, the most valued psychic out there. But for me, honesty trumps concern for accuracy.
When the client and I have a connection, the information flows, I see it before I can say it, or sometimes things come out of my mouth that I don’t expect while the client nods and says “yes, exactly.” Those are amazing times.
But there are times I simply can’t “click in” to a client. The cards on the table don’t make a pattern. I don’t see the storyline. The client asks for their guides and I hear a ringing silence. They ask for past lives and I see the riffling pages of a book but it doesn’t stop anywhere and open up to share their stories. Or they ask to speak to one of their loved ones passed, and it’s like I am standing in the foyer of an empty hotel. No one is there to answer.
These things happen. It doesn’t mean I am a bad intuitive, or that there is anything wrong with the client. It may mean that Spirit has another reader in mind for them, who might serve them better. It might be that the information they seek isn’t appropriate for them to have at the moment. Or it may simply be that they are asking the wrong questions for what they really want to know, and so Spirit sits back and waits until the right question is posed.
In cases like that – usually within the first 5-7 minutes of a session – I give the client back their money, and apologize for not connecting. I can’t worry about my ego in those situations, because that means I’d be putting my wellbeing ahead of the client’s. Instead, I save both of us time and frustration by admitting that, in this case, I’m not the right “megaphone” to give them what they want or need to hear
DON’T TRY TO MANIPULATE WHAT YOU ARE GETTING FROM SPIRIT
Here are two commonplace points where “push comes to shove:”
The client asks if someone has feelings for them. You say you don’t see that. That the object of their affection has someone else, and they are happy together. Then the client asks “but will they leave that partner for me?” And you say they won’t. And the client says “but if they fight will I get them…” and on and on. The client so desperately needs the answer to be a certain way that they will push for what they want regardless of what you tell them, giving you scenario after scenario in hopes to get a foot in the door. And like the water that wears down the rock, there will be times that it works, and you’ll be tempted to throw down an eighth or ninth set of cards and say “well, maybe, if…”
Or a couple very much wants a baby, and you simply don’t see it. They say, “But we’re desperate! We’ve done everything!” And you look again, and there is no child. And she begins to cry. And so you try another spread, asking Spirit again, and grasp at any etheric straw you can to give them hope.
Or someone says “I’ve just poured everything I have into my business. Will it be successful?” And even with an elaborate spread it says that they are in the wrong career, and the business is likely to toddle along weakly, if not collapse outright. So you mitigate what you see and are tempted to tell them stories of other people who pulled situations out of the tank.
In each situation, all the client hears is that there is hope for a hopeless situation, a chance to have what is not rightfully theirs according to destiny, Spirit and karma. They aren’t learning from the situation, and you have compromised your own honesty factor.
I am not saying to tell them “it’s all horrible, you’re going to lose everything and die alone and miserable.” There are ways of gently explaining that what they want is literally not in the cards, and it would benefit them to look at alternative situations: dating someone else or working on their current relationship…adoption or fostering children…or making sure that they have a Plan B or exit strategy for the business situation.
And at the last, if they simply won’t accept the bad news, you can gently remind them of the “85%” rule above, and wish them the best.
When a client will not listen to what is being said, then the honest intuitive will gently close the book on the session, and then not read them in the future. Neither your life nor theirs is being well facilitated by the transaction.
All of this will help in your most important PR project, and that is being seen as a real, professional intuitive that can be trusted.